How Far Will You Go?!

Table of Contents

How Far Will You Go?!

…if it’s:
- Free, even if you know it could be bad?
- One of a kind?
- The last one?
- Historic or reminiscent?
- You get the point!!!!

This question has been my cycling companion lately. And why, you ask? Because fate delivered the coupon below—a golden ticket, if you will—for FREE PIZZA! 🍕

I’ll dissect this cheesy conundrum after the Nebaletan Word of the Day!

Nebaletan Word of the Day – SCOLAMACAROON

One of my favorite Nebaletan words is SCOLAMACAROON which originated for me with my mother (Grandma Joanne).

I also reached out to my cousin Bonita. She confirmed that she still uses SCOLAMACAROON and learned it from her mother (Aunt Teresa) who likely learned it from her mother (Grandma Maouri).

ASIDE

As mentioned previously, Grandma Maouri was my mother’s adoptive mother. It never felt adopted. And for that, I will be eternally grateful! We are part of that family, forever.

Ancestry.com says Bonnie is a “3rd Cousin”; not in my mind, never! She, and her sister Judy, were surrogate mothers to me while Nicky and Ronnie were playmates. I can remember epic wiffle ball games as if yesterday. I quietly follow their kids and grandkids on Facebook and root as hard for their success just as I do my own!

It’s taught me that there’s blood, and then there’s family!

END ASIDE, and my crying…for now…

Back to SCOLAMACAROON:
- pronounced skull-a-muc-a-roon
- definition – pasta strainer, colander
- “Real” Italian word – Scolapasta
- Likely it’s an amalgamation of the Italian Word “Scolare” which means to drain and pasta, and therefore scolapasta is to drain the pasta.
- But, in the typical Nebaletan way, the word “pasta” is too bougie (read: Northern Italian) so, it’s far more Nebaletan to use macaroon (macaroni)

Grandma Maouri’s family originated in Molise (adjacent to Campania), and her husband, Grandpa Pesc (for Pasquale) from Marigliano (Napoli). Grandpa Pesc was the blood brother of Grandma Joanne’s mother, Grandma Jenny. And in the typical Southern Italian “way” (it truly was a way), Grandma Joanne was adopted by family.

As a result, I can never recall as a child using the term pasta! It was, is, and always will be MACARONI!

ASIDE #2

We had friends over for a pizza party this week. Ben is a first-generation Sicilian-American. They called it SCOLAPASTA! Go figure!

END ASIDE #2

Here’s a typical conversation that occurs today with my wife or kids goes like this:.
- Me – to my wife, “Cathy get the SCOLAMACAROON, please.”
- Cathy- looking at me with a confused look and replying, “What the hell are you talking about?”
- Me – in exasperation, “THE…SCOLAMACAROON!” (with the inflection like THE Ohio State University)
- Cathy – with an even more annoyed gaze. Although, I CAN HEAR WHAT SHE’S THINKING which is “WTF!“
- Me – “You know, the pasta strainer“
- Cathy – again thinking “WTF” but replying, “OK! Why don’t you just say that?”
- Me – with my head now rattled, and thinking, “I can’t!”

So, every time that I use a SCOLAMACAROON I can’t help but feel that I’m paying homage to Grandma Joanne, Aunt Theresa, and Grandma Maouri and my cousins and our Southern Italian roots. Not only because of the word’s use but also because I’m likely making MACARONI!

Pizza Review – Circle K, Sarasota, FL, Palmer Ranch

So, let’s get back to that personal perplexing question from above..at what length will you (or I for that matter) go for pizza? What if the pizza is free? What if, even before you go, you know that free pizza won’t turn out well? Hmm…that’s a tough one!

In any event, Sarasota, as one of the fastest growing areas in the USA, has equally fast retail growth. In our housing-crammed burb, Publix found a way to shoehorn a small plaza in between the sprawl despite already having other Publix only 3 miles and 5 miles away!

But, in Publix’s way (read that as idiotic), we now have a center 1 mile from our house!

Publix also found a way to wedge in a Circle K with gas pumps despite the very loud objections from the ritzy development adjacent to that said plaza (see here)! Our development is neither ritzy nor adjacent, so we didn’t complain despite Publix’s innate stupidity!

Soon, as close neighbors, we received a snail mail promotional flyer offering FREE PIZZA from….Circle K?!?!?!?! That coupon sat for nearly a month

So, the answer to “How far will I go for free pizza?” Well, if it’s Circle K, about 1 mile! I only wish it was further away, I probably wouldn’t have gone and endured the below! Oh, how I wish we got a WaWa instead!

Date	3/16/24
Pizzeria	In this case, a very loosely defined term! Circle K
City/Neighborhood	Sarasota, FL/Palmer Ranch
Website	Convenience Store & Gas Station \| Circle K
About Us	Are you kidding me? How ’bout conglomerate America, big oil? But, we can put in a microwave pizza oven and sell reheated crap?
Style	Maybe NY
Ambiance	Take out to my van, although Circle K does have Coke slushies which is my all time favorite mid bike ride drink when it’s hot! That’s me, trying to find any redeeming qualities from this…err, pizza?!
Beverage Pairing	Coke Zero – despite my musing above about Coke Slushie, the machine wasn’t working!

This is what Gas Station Pizza looks like in the USA…how sad!

This is what Gas Station Pizza Looks Like in Southern Italy – dough that’s fermented 48 hours and a real oven! And, BTW, the gas station pizzas in Italy, “they’re real and spectacular!“

Couldn’t help myself!

Rating Criteria
Shape	Round – single slice
Dough/Crust	Tickness – Medium Cook – Soft, greasy Flavor – Buttery likely on from cheese and pepperoni
Cornicione	Crispy, Chewy, Rubbery
Toppings	Pepperoni, Cheese Fresh – silly question
Sauce	Tangy, Spicy, Dried out – too many hours in the rotisserie
Cheese	Cheese Type – moozedell Cheese Distribution – All over Greasy, Salty
Cheese to Sauce Ratio	Sauce – Medium Cheese – Medium Balance – good balance doesn’t always make good pizza

That big ol’ grease spot on the paper carrier…oh, so appetizing!?!?!?

Value	Not bad, at $2.5 per slice, but to repeat, doesn’t make it good!
Overall Rating	Meh
Would I Go Back?	NOT EVEN IF IT’S FREE AGAIN! In 40+ years of cycling, I’ve stopped countless times at a convenience store for liquids or a Snickers bar, but, I’ve never purchased pizza. This convinced me not to start either!